Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Rooftop Nighttime Picnics

Tracie in Charge! 

How I desperately wish, haha!

Right now, I am in a turbulent river, doggy paddling just to stay up! But the good news is that my shoulders and face are getting sunburned while swimming, the water is the perfect temperature, and I'm wearing a really cute swimsuit. So really, it's an overall fabulous experience, being tossed around in this body of water called life. And I'm loving every minute of it.

My concert is finally happening next week! I have seriously poured so much of myself into dancing this year, that I am exhausted, emotionally and physically. It has been the most fruitful dancing year of my life, I have learned so very much about myself, the amazing girls I dance with, and dance itself. I could never stop. I complain about it daily, but it is truly my one release. It is the one aspect in my life in which I can confidently say I am not a failure in, because success directly follows effort. It is instant gratification at it's finest and least morally offensive. Most of the time. :) So after this week, I will have much more time, but will be very lost.

I love every single thing I'm learning about. Some of it, I have to try much harder to love, but when it comes, it is amazing. I have an exam in one hour, and I am terrified. Exams are the bane of my existence. I feel like I've tried my best. I don't know what else to do to prepare. But the score is always a surprise. Hopefully, it will reflect my efforts and passion. 

Never in my life have I been so ridiculously blessed in the people surrounding me. False, always in my life, I have been ridiculously blessed, but the fact that I STILL am getting THIS blessed is amazing. My Heavenly Father, my roommates, my wonderful family, my neighbors, my dance family, every single person who has smiled at me has given me the determination to love as much as they love me, despite how very little I deserve it. I am incredibly blessed.

So while this week has been one of the hardest in my life, while it's only Wednesday, it has been incredibly rewarding. I love the feeling of going to bed, completely exhausted, but knowing you did everything you could that day.
And even if I'm not happy when I accidentally swallow a gulp of river water or my contacts are getting blurry from the waves splashing me, I am enormously happy and satisfied with being able to swim in the the river in the first place. Because it's a beautiful day.

Faith removes all Fear.

I've given, and I've received.
Life is Good, and I can't wait for more.


Laura Burtis said...

T - first of all, you are such a talented writer! I love reading your posts because they are so witty and well written. Next, I am so proud of you for all you accomplish - you are absolutely amazing!! I hope you know that! I seriously CANNOT wait to come watch you dance next week - you are my fave dancer to watch!
Good luck on your exam in an hour!!
I sure do love you, and absolutely cannot wait to see you this weekend!!

Kathrin Paul said...

Nicely done, little lamb. Perfectly metaphor-ed. You're a champ.

Robmary said...

Good Luck on your test tracie :) !